A flashback. (A show-and-tell Sunday post of sorts.)

June 22, 2008 at 8:58 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 20 Comments

Baby O woke up screaming on Friday morning. I brought him into bed with me and he dozed. When he woke up, he refused to nurse. For a good three hours, he fretted and fussed and refused to eat. I gave him some baby t.ylenol and hoped it would work. It didn’t seem to do much to help.

So when I changed his diaper, I took his temperature. It was 100.1, an hour and a half after I gave him the medication.

I called the pediatrician, and they told me to bring him in. They were concerned his cold might have turned into an ear infection. They examined his ears, and had to clean the wax out of one. Which made him scream, as he was already fussy to begin with.

But they didn’t see anything upon examination of his ears. So they instead sent us down to the lab for a blood draw – they wanted to make sure his white blood count wasn’t elevated.*

I’m not sure what I expected. I guess I thought they’d prick the heel of his foot like they did when he was newly born.

But when they brought us back to the phlebotomist’s room, they asked one of us to sit in the chair and roll up his sleeve.

I think it was the chair that undid me. How many times did I sit in it and have my own blood drawn on our path to bring him home with us?

Daily draws for one full week before retrievals.

Every other day blood draws for our frozen cycles.

Beta days for all 5 cycles.

It just didn’t seem fair that they were going to do the same thing on my son.

I lost it. I teared up, and I handed J our son, and told him that I just couldn’t, and would he hold Baby O while they took his blood? And then I turned away and I went into the bathroom, and I cried. And I felt like a coward. Because here I was crying when they were poking my baby with a needle. Who was the mom here?

And this wonderful, wonderful nurse saw me crying. And she brought me a glass of water and a tissue, and told me that it was ok.

I couldn’t explain to her why I was crying so hard. It had been a stressful morning, for sure. I was really worried about Baby O, yes. I hate seeing someone stick my baby with a needle, yes.

It was that stupid fucking chair.

*They did call me and tell me that Baby O’s white blood count was normal and that they suspected it was a virus. He was no worse for the wear – slept a ton on Friday, went down early, and seemed better on Saturday. Today he’s about the same as he was on Friday – crying and fussing, but no high temperature. I’m just hoping that tomorrow he’s a little better, the poor kid.

And he did just fine with the blood draw. In fact, he screamed harder and louder when the pediatrician cleaned out his ears to examine them then he did when they drew his blood. And he had a little bandage to show off to everyone.



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  1. Hi,
    I am a friend of Kelly Hutcheson (Life is Good: Lily Grace). I love your blog. I just wanted to let you know that I totally feel your pain. When our 8 month old, Alan, was 3 months old he spiked a 101.5 fever and we had to take him into the ER where they had to draw blood and put a heplock in. I ran out of the room hysterical and left my husband with Alan. Yeah, felt like crap. After leaving with a virus diagnosis, we went home and ended up back in the dr. office on Monday where he spiked a 104.1 fever and we were admitted into the hospital. Again, I was a mess especially having to hold him down while doing chest xrays. Nothing, two days in the hospital and it was a stupid virus.

    So, I total empathize with you! Hope Baby O is doing better.


  2. Geez, Been there done that. LOL just this week to!!! Glad that little man is doing better though. I would really start looking for teeth as that is what ended up being the Turtle’s undoing….. She is driving us all mad right now…. when baby ain’t happy, ain’t no one happy!!!

    Hugs to you and Baby O!!

  3. There is nothing more scary than sick baby and not knowing why. One thing I wanted to throw out there, with my son Tylenol will not bring down a fever at all, ever. Motrin will but tylenol will not. It is the strangest thing and one I learned after a scary fever that didn’t budge and freaked me out (103) and then within a half hour of motrin it was down. A doc had recommended switching giving both alternately because of pain and fever and the motrin worked for the fever.

    Just a thought.

    Good luck.

  4. One of my worst moments was when Baby B had to have an IV put in while in the ER for pneumonia so she could get antibiotics and a steroid for her lungs. They did a fantastic job and got it on the first try, but I had to make The Husband stand there at her side while they did it. I know if he hadn’t been there, I would’ve found a way to be there for her (and I know you would have, too, if that’d been the case), but given the circumstances we had, I just couldn’t.

    It’s funny, though…I hadn’t thought about that moment in probably at least 6 months until just now. It’s just a tiny blip on the radar of our lives now, as it will be for you all before long. 🙂 Parenting is a two-person job, and there’s no way both parents can be strong 100% of the time. Tag-teaming it works very well! 🙂

    Hope Baby O is feeling better this week! Summer colds/viruses suck!!


  5. oh, how i hate those fucking chairs. i wouldn’t have been able to do it either. poor baby o, and poor miss s. i hope he feels better soon.
    auden gets his shots next week and i am sure to be a mess.

  6. Not a big fan of the blood crap for me or the kiddos. It’s true in our family that the wax dig is way more traumatic! Give yourself a break…go easy on yourself..this is why we have such amazing men in our lives to be fathers! I’ve left my hubby a time or two in the same situation. It’s still overwhelming. I’m glad to hear he’s okay now…and that you are too hopefully. 🙂

  7. Here they have you hold the baby and they take blood from a vein in the neck(!) Sounds scary, but it’s actually much easier to find the vein there and the kids barely seem to notice, believe it or not…

  8. Poor baby O. I would have cried too Serenity. I am glad that baby O is okay . Looks like he did great a job. Love th pc, he is cuter and cuter by the day

  9. How could you not cry, the poor dear. I’m so happy he’s okay!

  10. poor baby o! IF doesn’t ever go away does it? i hope you both are feeling a little better, now. : )

  11. Ugh! I am so sorry! I had to go through that with my son about a month ago as well, and it was awful. The lab couldn’t get the blood, after three sticks so we were then sent to the hospital for htem to get it. I cried the whole way to the hospital, and the whole way home. It was one of the worst things I’ve ever had to do as a mom. And it’s interesting how you mention that you were thinking of all the blood draws you’ve had through out your IF journey- I was thinking the exact same thing. It really never leaves us, it’s part of us forever, isn’t it.

    Hugs to you!

  12. That post and anology about the chair just put me in tears. Of course you were feeling that way. Poor you and Poor Baby O too. I hope he is feeling better today.

    You too.


  13. Serenity-
    Don’t feel bad, I would have done the same thing. When Summer was a baby she was hospitalized for jaundice and when they did the heel sticks I had to leave the room. I had to leave for her 2 week and 1 month old shots as well. Finally at her 2 month shots my husband was like you have to come in just in case I can’t be here one time. So I KNOW I how you felt. You are doing SO great.

  14. Don’t feel bad. There are certain things that have bothered me too and I made my DH handle it. Our DD had tubes put in her ears when she was 18 months old and one of us needed to take her back to the operating room and stay with her until she was put under. I asked DH to do it. I didn’t think I could handle it.

  15. I never thought of the whole going back to IVF days, jesus. Just what you needed. Scary enough to do for the first time with O, but in that damn chair. I totally get it (as much as someone without a kid but who’s been in that chair can).

  16. I feel your pain! Our youngest had RSV when she was just 6 weeks old and I was a mess as they tried to put the IV in (and the first nurse couldn’t get it into her tiny vein!) I was there by myself with her so I was the only one who could hold her and I would have given anything to have traded places with her so she didn’t have to go through that (lord knows I have been stuck enough that I– a former needlephobe– don’t even wince any more).
    It’s totally normal to freak out. Don’t worry- they’re too young now to remember that we were wimps. There’s plenty of time to make them think we’re the bravest people on the planet 🙂

  17. Ugh – that chair. If I never seen one again it will be too soon. I just realized that my DSD chose THAT color to paint her new room! No wonder I had such a negative reaction to it (can you imagine being surrounded by that color day and night)? It is the one thing she has input for, so I gotta live with it.

  18. Sounds about right to me. I cried like crazy when Sean had the heelstick for his jaundice at 4-days old, and again when he had his first vaccinations. Somehow, I managed to pull it together for his 4-month and 6-month shots…
    I would’ve cried too if they had to take his blood.

  19. Glad Baby O is doing OK. I’m sure I would have been crying too! He’s a brave kid!

  20. Glad he’s recovered. Sounds like a nasty experience for all!


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