One, two, buckle my shoe.

March 11, 2010 at 2:58 pm | Posted in motherhood | 15 Comments

Not sure if it’s a two thing, or a toddler thing, or just an O thing.

But I’m finding these days he is pretty resistant to change.

And by change I mean the TINIEST of changes.

Like the weather, for example. This past weekend was really warm – think we got into the 60s at some point.

And he didn’t want to wear a coat. So I suggested that he wear his fleece instead.

Initially, he agreed – until I went to have him put it on. Then he balked and said, “No fleece, Mommy. Coat.”

So he wore his coat, and that was the end of that.

Did it twice more, too, when I asked him about wearing his fleece. Looks at me all serious, as if I’m trying to poison him.

“No Mommy. NO. NO fleece.”

All righty then. No fleece.

Oh, but the SHOES.

Now, O’s been wearing the same pair of shoes for a few months now. And because I bought the things at Target so that I wouldn’t spend $30 on a pair of shoes, they’re starting to fall apart. With spring coming, and knowing that they play outside EVERY DAY now, I thought it would be good to get him a more sturdy pair.

So on Monday night, I went to Carter’s and got him a really cute pair of shoes.

By “cute” I mean they were on sale and they seem really well made and should last a while.


He won’t wear them.

I will take full responsibility for this.

I think I made too much of a big deal out of the new shoes.

Because on Tuesday morning I went upstairs and showed him his “new shoes!”

Clearly my child isn’t related to me. Because when *I* hear “new shoes” I immediately think “WOO HOO!!” I LOVE shoes. They make me happy.

Not O.

When I put them on that morning, he actually cried big fat crocodile tears. “NO new shoes. No Mommy, no new shoes!” He protested so much that I felt bad about it.

So I took them off and let him wear his old shoes. I mean, really. Not interested in a power struggle over a pair of SHOES. He can wear whatever he wants.

And Wednesday morning, the same thing happened. Except this time I managed to convince him that he should give them a try. Which lasted all of about five minutes before he had his old shoes in his hand, tentatively walking over to me in order to beg me to let him wear “old shoes!”

In those five minutes, though, I confirmed that they are, in fact, REALLY cute.

Oh, and that they fit him and don’t pinch or anything, too.


Currently his Cute Shoes reside on Puppy, who loves O’s new shoes so much that he dances and hops whenever he gets to wear them. (On some sage advice, we tried this in the hopes that O would see how AWESOME! NEW! SHOES! ARE! and maybe, you know, put them on his feet himself.)


By my son’s stubborn reckoning, they’re PUPPY’S shoes now. And apparently PUPPY doesn’t even like to wear them because he spent most of the morning saying, “Puppy new shoes. OFF! No new shoes, Puppy!”

Want to take bets as to whether or not he’ll outgrow them before he actually gets to WEAR them?

I’m attributing this to toddler OCD, as I recall my SIL telling me that my nephew D did something similar last summer (when he was about O’s age).

But hey. He’s a little person. With his own OPINIONS. He has a right to choose which shoes he wants to wear. And as long as he’s wearing shoes, I personally don’t care which ones those are.

And I can’t tell you that I don’t find it at least a LITTLE funny, too. 🙂



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  1. Oh good luck. Little ones can be so picky can’t they. My daughter is 7 1/2 and still doesn’t like change. She got mad at us when we sold our old car, cried when I sold an old dresser, hates it when I get rid of anything. I have to sneak the stuff she outgrows out of her room in the dark of night and then pretend “it’s dirty and in the laundry” until she forgets about it or gives up. I hope it’s just a stage for O. Over the years I’ve had to “retire” A LOT of clothes that were hardly ever worn. Sigh.

  2. toddler OCD … LOL , love it… Lyla has the same issues, except with shoes, she loves all kinds! after all, she is a girl!

  3. Willow is like this with other things…she has a cute red jacket that went with a holiday outfit that she WOULD not let out of her sight. We let her wear it for the holidays, but it got colder and she wanted to wear it like it was a coat. So we took to HIDING it. Which works well, until she FINDS it. (Same with her boots)

  4. My assvice…play dressup? Can you get some play shoes and clothes from goodwill and you get some of your stuff and play dress up and see if he will try different things?

  5. OMG I melted at the image of O coming over to you with shoes in hand…MELTED.

  6. LOL!

    What worked for my 3-y/o (but may not work for O), was just to put him in the new (and therefore “offending”) shirt or shoes, and after a while, he forgot that he was wearing them, and the next time I put them on, he was okay with it. This was after he wore the same red sleeveless T-shirt for a week solid, and absolutely refused to wear any other shirt. Finally, said T-shirt got wet so he took it off, and insisted on wearing some shirt, and finally found one he liked. So then, he would willingly wear two shirts. Gradually, I worked on up so now he’ll wear most of his shirts.

    Ditto the shoes — I had some Thomas the Tank Engine shoes which he insisted on wearing to the exclusion of all others. Finally *they* got dirty, or couldn’t be found, so he *had* to wear other shoes. He cried at first, but after that, he was okay with wearing that 2nd pair. There are still some shoes he won’t wear, and there is no good reason for it, except that he has never worn them yet, so he simply won’t. Oh, well. Kids!

  7. Cute story! Not that you asked but I it were K or L? I’d be hoofing it back to Target to get the same pair just a size up.

  8. Our solution to this type of problem, as it relates to the jelly shoes I regret ever buying, hide the shoes. If he/you can’t find them, he HAS to wear the ‘cute’ shoes, because ‘we can’t go outside without shoes…that’s owie to our feet!’

  9. Oh god toddler OCD – we totally have a case of that in our house.

  10. toddler OCD…Love it.

    I have been reading a lot of articles on the Hugg*ies network (who knew that this would be my reading choices) and it’s sooo typical of kids that are 2…
    my boys do this constantly, they want applesauce, no yogurt, no applesauce. They want to wear the blue, no the orange, no the blue. By the time they decide , stop fighting with each other about which shirt they want to wear I want to kill myself…or take a freakin nap.

    from what I have read, this is VERY VERY NORMAL and extremely typical. Change is very very very bad (LOL) for toddlers, and you should try to avoid it at all costs…HAHAHHH as if!!!!!

    ok,, so I’m making fun, but it’s sort of true. well a lot true. Toddlers like repitition and any change to them is just life shattering. This morning, the three of us were downstairs. I was making breakfast and packing it for DC. I gave them pancakes, they wanted apple jacks, after much screaming I gave in and they got Apple jacks…so things got quiet and then I said OK…let’s go upstairs and get dressed for school…and the toddler fell apart and it was pushing pulling, screaming (mine not theirs) to get them upstairs, because they wanted to stay at the table and the change was too much.

    I hear that by 3 , with more vocabulary , less autonomy things start to get better. But being honest, the articles make me feel better about what’s going on in my house, it makes it seem normal..which is what I need right now.


  11. […] One, two, buckle my shoe. « Serenity Now! […]

  12. Oh yes, Toddler OCD I am so very famlliar with that. Woe to the parent who dares to change THE RIGHT WAY TO DO THINGS. You have my every sympathy.

  13. I remember going through this with Doodicus. He had ONE pair of shoes aat any one time. Aitch? She has about four that she can wear at any given time, but I’ll tell you it doesn’t matter. It’s them trying to manipulate the little bit of their world that they can. It’s adorable and frustrating at the same time.

    • Please help-
      My son is 2 1/2 and I don’t know what to do. He lines things up, like cars, teddies, etc. He has screaming fits when things aren’t done a certain way, like when I fill up his tippy cup, he has to be the one to hand me the lid and say, want this mommy? and if it doesn’t go that way it’s a screaming meltdown, and that is what happens constantly throughout the day with many things. He memorizes so many things, songs, movie dialog, books. I have taken him to the doc and voiced my concerns and she said, no he doesn’t have autisim maybe a bit ocd. Any suggestions? I don’t know how to deal with the screaming meltdowns, he is very verbal, can count in English and Spanish, but when he is having a fit, he won’t speak at all, just screams!

  14. I’d like to find out more? I’d like to find out some additional information.

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