My Zen.

July 15, 2010 at 7:28 am | Posted in And I ran (I ran so far away), motherhood | 7 Comments

My commute is on local back roads which takes me through Topsfield and Boxford – two towns which, as far as Northeastern Massachusetts go, are old and nice and historic, with big Victorians and Colonials that have plaques on the house that say something like “Charles Hutchinson’s Homestead, 1663.”

I love it. It’s one of the most relaxing parts of my day – where I can just point my car in a direction and let it glide me home. There’s no jockeying for position like there is on an interstate highway. The houses, the gardens, the trees, the country roads – all of it helps me breathe away the stress of work.

After three days of half workdays the week before our first quarter audit and a toddler crying most of the time in pain, last night I found myself in desperate need of a run. Normally I run in the mornings, but last night I had planned on meeting up with a new runners club at their first meeting.

Which, of course, ended up being cancelled because of rain (really it was DRIZZLING – nothing crazy).

So instead of going straight home last night once I found out that the meetup was cancelled?

I decided to stop in Topsfield Center, park my car, and do my run there.

No iPod last night, either.

Just me and big historic houses and a winding path next to a country road.

I ran three miles, and with every step, I felt myself becoming more and more relaxed.

Even better – I finished 3 miles in under 28 minutes. My last mile was an 8:55 minute pace, and I finished with a sprint which left me feeling strong and happy.

When I got home, J was putting O to bed. I went up to say goodnight to my still-not-well son, and reached into his crib to push the hair away from his forehead.

He refused to let me leave his room – grabbed my hand and rolled over to his side with it, snuggling against my arm. And then he fell asleep a few minutes later, his breath warm against my wrist.

And I just stood there.

And I looked down at my sleeping son, the warmth of the run still in my muscles, my heart swollen with love and worry and gratefulness and happiness.

How did I ever get this lucky?



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  1. Wonderful moment. Thanks for sharing.

  2. I used to have a commute through Concord and Lexington and it was just so relaxing (but long).

    That run and the good night with O, sounds so peaceful. Those moments make all the tough times worth it.

  3. I love this post, everything about it!

  4. Any conscious move toward simplicity and mindfulness is apt to help you relx, centre and enrich well-being. May you continue to listen to intuition, deepen insight into peace and happiness and a sense of connectedness to everything along your journey.

  5. Such a beautiful post. And such a great moment!


  6. that was a gorgeous post, a really beautiful day in the midst of all the “Stuff” you’ve had going on this week.
    I am glad you got that run, that snuggle, that zen and love with your son.

    Lucky…and blessed for sure. You deserve every single bit of it my friend.

  7. Dude, you totally choked me up with this last part. Gah!

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