More Limbo *with an update*

November 10, 2010 at 3:01 pm | Posted in FET #5: Last Chance Waltz, Pregnancy | 36 Comments

750.

That was today’s draw.

Bad. I stated to my nurse.

Well, you’re right on the cusp she replied.

I’ve heard that before.

Ultrasound on Monday.

(Update: I called and asked for a repeat beta on Friday so that I know, at least, if this is going to shit BEFORE the weekend.)

Until then?

No running.

No alcohol.

No real coping tools right now.

I’m pissed off and all I am allowed to do is sit here and wait for the end.

Fucking AWESOME.

And this song? Is about the best thing that describes it for me right now.

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36 Comments »

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  1. I know firsthand that nothing I say can help, but thinking of you.

    XOXO

  2. Thinking of you..

    Leslie B.

  3. *hugs*

  4. Oh sweetie. That is the worst bit too – being on the cusp – can’t go for a big angry run for fear of messing with things, can’t drink into oblivion for the same reason. Still thinking good thoughts and sending them your way.

  5. Oh, I am so sorry to hear that. I’ll be thinking of you (truthfully, I think about you all the time these days, even though I don’t know you).

  6. Fuck! I know this is NOT the news you wanted or were hoping to hear. All you can do is wait it out.

    Honestly, I would not wait until Monday (I know more can be learned by Monday, but given that today is Wednesday, as much can be learned by another beta in 2 days (I had 4 betas at 10, 12, 14 & 19 dpt).

    Even if you have to go again on Monday, if you think that having information is good for you, go in again on Friday.

    • Thanks for the suggestion – I went ahead and called my clinic and asked for another beta on Friday. They were happy to oblige, so I’ll know something more on Friday afternoon. Still not expecting any miracles, however.

  7. I’m so, so sorry. I’m around if you want to get together to vent, go to a playground to revel in the amazing children we DO have, whatever. *hugs*

  8. limbo is a hard place to be. Hang in there. Could be a slow starter, right?

  9. hugs

  10. I’m so very sorry to read this. I’m hoping for better news and preparing for the worst right along with you.

  11. I’m with andbabybmakesthree. There are no words. I’m thinking about you.

  12. *hugs*

  13. Fucking a.

    I’m thinking of you. xo

  14. I’m so sorry you are in limbo. Thinking of you.

  15. I am glad you are going for a Beta on Friday, waiting is excruciating.
    Thinking of you.

  16. Just know that we’re all thinking of you. Hugs.

  17. Crap. I wanted better news for you.

  18. Fuck. You’re in my thoughts.

  19. I am so sorry to ask this, but are you cramping at all? Is there any concern of an ectopic?

    • Anon – an ectopic is first on my list of worries, too. I’m keeping an eye on cramping. Nothing right now, but I have had a twinge on my right side here and there. If it gets worse I will be on the phone with my clinic right away.

  20. Crap. Hope this turns around.

  21. I have had it both ways a sudden, fast m/c and one I had to wait for. Hopefully neither of those things is happening right now. But the horrible waiting just sucks. I’m so sorry.

  22. Awesome. As you said.

    Things crossed for a good beta Friday and a good ultrasound Monday.

    Bea

  23. Sending big love and lots of hope.

  24. Thinking of you, sweetie. ((hugs))

  25. Damn it. Abiding with you, hon. [[Hugs]]

  26. Damn it. Wish there was something I could do to make this better. #%$^$@@!

  27. sending much love and lots of hope. thinking of you, s. xxoo

  28. Wish I had something brilliant to say. But I don’t. My heart aches today.

  29. Hoping all will be ok. Hugs being sent your way.

  30. Balls. Limbo (with the gut feeling behind it) sucks hard enough. Not having your outlets available to de-stress, that really stinks. Sorry you have to be in this crappy place.

  31. :o( This isn’t what I thought I’d see when I logged in today. Can’t say anything that will help and I want to so badly.

  32. SIGH. I can’t ever get that smiley thing right. It was frowning. Dang it. frowning. Not looking halfway surprised and idiotic. Sorry about that. 😦

  33. thinking of you….I haven’t been here to read these posts, but I have been “With” you..and I am just keeping all my fingers crossed. Head up….keep going. We’re all here for you.
    xoxoo

  34. […] And when my anthem came on, the one that signifies my November of loss, the one that helps me really FEEL the grief, I ran harder. […]


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