Courage.

February 13, 2012 at 3:49 pm | Posted in And I ran (I ran so far away), Career angst | 17 Comments

All weekend, I was on edge. Especially yesterday. I was on edge enough that I lobbied yesterday afternoon to go to the gym.

Well, lobby implies resistance. There was none. All I said to Charlie Brown was, I need a run.

And he told me to go for it. No questions, nothing. Just go.

So a 5k later, I felt the usual endorphins kick in, and I was able to relax. Thankfully. I felt normal, more balanced.

And woke up this morning on edge. So, so edgy.

I went in early this morning and scheduled a meeting on my boss’s calendar because he was doing other things this morning.

When he stopped by just before 11 to tell me he was ready, I very nearly passed out.

But I took a deep breath.

This is best for my family.

This is best for my family.

It took every ounce of courage I had to walk into that office and shut the door.

The fear aside, our meeting itself went better than I ever could have anticipated. He wasn’t surprised; he’s noticed me worn a little thin these past few months.

And when I told him about Charlie Brown’s new job, he said he had some concerns about how we’d make it work.

So he wasn’t shocked when I blurted that I was giving my notice today.

He was, however, very kind. He offered himself as a reference whenever I needed it. He told me that he really appreciated everything I’ve contributed for the past 3.5 years here, that I have the capability to do great things in whatever I wanted to do.

And he said, Kudos to you for knowing your limits and striking out and doing your own thing.

And he even asked me if I was open to a consulting arrangement in the next couple of months. We’d pay you as a consultant, of course, he said.

So. That’s done.

My last day is Friday, February 24.

Exhaling now.

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17 Comments »

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  1. Proud of you!!!

  2. Congratulations! Great about the consulting offer, too. That shows you really have been a good worker.

  3. Woo hoo! I am proud, too. And I hope you are proud of yourself. And see, you’re already getting consulting work…the financial part will fall into place.

  4. Good for you, hon!! Glad he understood and is even wants you to consult!

  5. WAY TO GO!!!! I am so glad it went well, I was praying for you!!!

  6. I am so proud of you. Glad it went well. That comment about the consulting is great- shows that you really can leave with no hard feelings, and that he is impressed with what you have done there.

    (And thank you for the comment on my blog- we did try to dreamfeed E. way back in the day- we gave it up when we realized that it actually disrupted his sleep and caused him to wake up more frequently for the rest of the night. But I agree- if it works, it is a great option.)

    xoxoxo
    T.

  7. Congratulations. That’s truly awesome that it went so well.

  8. Oh, good for you! That took guts. Really delighted that your boss took it well — a consulting offer definitely speaks to your value as a worker.

  9. Good for you!

  10. Glad that step is done. Hope it’s the beginning of a much happier work situation.

    XOXO

  11. So great that your boss was kind and offered not only some nice words but an opening for a consultant position. Smiling ear to ear for you!

  12. So happy for you!

  13. I am SO, SO, SO PROUD of you! I literally am teary with relief and pride for you.

    You DID it. And, whatever you do next, you will own it and rise to the challenge.

    As scary as I know it is, I am so, so proud of you.

    Congrats!

    (After I left my career, on my first day home, a colleague sent me an email that simply said, “Welcome to your new and better life”.) That is my wish for you…a new and better life.

  14. GO You!!! I’m so happy that this is over for you; so happy to know that your boss said he would be a reference; and so excited for your new, more balanced life!

  15. Well done! I’m proud of you! Sounds like it went really well 🙂

  16. So proud of you! It really sounds like you did the right thing.

  17. And, honestly, the HARDER thing.


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