New Life.February 29, 2012 at 2:20 pm | Posted in And I ran (I ran so far away), Career angst, motherhood | 6 Comments
You’d think that finishing a job, taking a day off, and starting a new one would have meant OODLES more time to blog.
I finished at my Old Company on Friday 2/24. Celebrated with Charlie Brown by having a Date Night for sushi and dessert, neatly ended with a call to AAA. (Well, actually, we got someone to give Charlie’s car a jump before AAA got there, thankfully. My fault, really – unlike MY car, apparently you actually need to SHUT OFF THE HEADLIGHTS before you leave. Leaving said headlights on for two hours IS, actually, enough to kill the battery. Who knew?)
Then I was off on Saturday to Cape Cod for a girls weekend with my two running club friends. And instead of indulging in wine and sleeping in and getting massages, instead we all slept poorly and then got up early and ran a half marathon on Sunday.
Even though my longest run to date was only 7 miles, which REEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAALLLLLLY if I’m being honest was sort of more like running 5.5 and then run/walking to 7. But whatever, seven miles is seven miles.
BUT – I asked my new physical therapist if I should skip it, and he assured me that I couldn’t injure myself WORSE, that the most that would happen was that the tendinitis would flare up again. And that mentally, I kind of needed it. And I quote – he told me this: You don’t seem scared by much. This scares you. So I think you need this for your mental game.
Clearly the man doesn’t read my blog. This post is pretty clearly about being scared.
Anyway, I ran the damn half. And it was, in fact, a mental game from miles 4-10 – to keep running even though it was uncomfortable. And then it HURT. And then my garmin started beeping incessantly and shutting off and turning back on and I didn’t know how fucking far I was from the finish line and I cried because my leg hurt and my stupid garmin FAILED ME WHEN I NEEDED IT MOST.
(Okay, so I get a little emotional when things hurt. Whatever.)
But I stuck it out, finished 30 seconds later than my very FIRST half marathon, thereby setting a newest slowest half marathon PR, and proved that I didn’t injure myself WORSE, so that’s good. And I got 13.1 miles in to boot.
And then I cleaned and did laundry and errands and projects on Monday – my day off. And then I started my new gig on Tuesday; lots of work that’s starting out pretty slowly but I feel like I need to contribute and DO stuff.
So, uh, here I am. And crap, it’s Wednesday. And I haven’t posted since like, what, last Friday?
I’d like to be all like, Wow, I have SO MUCH FREE TIME NOW! except I’m pretty sure that’s not how real life works. What it MEANS is that I have more time to do all the crap I always ignored before: the clutter in the kitchen, washing all the dishes left in the sink at the end of the night, prepping lunches, bills, filing, etc.
All that life administration crap which really isn’t REWARDING, but good to get done.
Especially since the POINT of this work arrangement is to take the stress off Charlie Brown so he can focus on work. You know, in the hopes that someday I can stop worrying that he’s going to have a massive coronary from stress & sleep deprivation because I’ve taken on all the tasks that he thinks he needs to do at home.
(Fine, okay. I MIGHT have a problem with Slowing Down.)
The good news is that the idea that I don’t have to go back to a full time job makes me really, really happy. Happy enough that I was giddy leaving the office on Friday, could NOT wipe the smile from my face. Will be happy to settle into a new routine, but at the end of the day, I’m out of the toxic mess that was my old company.
So here begins my New Life.