Good Mornings.

January 17, 2013 at 8:48 am | Posted in Mama Bear | 5 Comments

Yesteday, Delenn posted a link on Facebook to a great Huffington post article called “The Last Time.”

Seriously, go read it. It made me cry.

_______________

Lucky isn’t what you’d call a morning person. Whenever we have to wake him up in the mornings, he’s grumpy and tired, and you have to take the right “tone” with him.

Since I’m not a morning person either, I totally get it.

See, my mother WAS a morning person, and when she used to wake us up, I swear her goal was to be AS.ANNOYING.AS.POSSIBLE. She’d come into our rooms, and say in this awful sing-songy tone: Good morning… it’s time to get up for SCH-OOOOOOOL!”

I get that when I wake Lucky up he’s going to be Grouchy Bear. So I keep my tone quiet and respectful, and I kiss him, and when he inevitably yells at me to GO! AWAY! MOMMY! I will generally tell him that I’ll leave if he really wants me to, it’s not a problem, that I hate getting up in the mornings too.

He doesn’t really want me to go. He just wants to go back to sleep.

I don’t remember when I suggested that we sit in his rocking chair until he was awake enough to go downstairs. But it was many months ago – before we put together his cardboard playhouse he loves, when the rocking chair was still a central part of his room.

He and I have spent HOURS in that rocking chair, you see. Maybe even days. It’s where I spent so much time nursing him overnight. It’s where I’ve gave him cuddles when he was so sick that one winter. It’s where we used to read stories every night before bed, before he got his Big Boy bed and wanted us to lay down with him.

And it’s sort of amazing – even now, with how tall he is, he can still fold himself into my lap, his head on my chest. The rocking chair squeaks now, and it’s stuck in the corner of the room next to his closet, behind his playhouse. To get to the chair requires squeezing by his desk, toy chest, AND the playhouse. And since our old house is insulated with (basically) newspaper, sitting in the chair is drafty and not so comfortable.

But. He refuses to let me take it out of his room, to put it away.

And so on Tuesday morning, when he was reluctant to have anything to do with waking up, I asked him if he thought a snuggle in the rocking chair might help a bit. He nodded, gathered up all his stuffed animals, and waited for me to pick him up.

We gingerly made our way to the chair and I smoothed one of his baby blankets over him. And then we rocked, his head on my chest, my arms wrapped around him, our breathing slow, and steady, my heart swollen with love and happiness and contentment and fulfillment.

And then he popped up, and told me, Okay, Mommy. I’m awake now. And we went downstairs and started our day.

But those moments with him on the rocker have stayed with me for two days now.

Snuggling with my son is my favorite part of parenting.

I have the hope that he never outgrows it. 🙂 But you know – I’m practical enough to realize that at some point, I’m certain he will. Everything, it seems, is fleeting when you’re a parent. The good. The bad. All of it.

All we can do is be in the moment and enjoy it while it lasts.

Now, if you’ll excuse me?

I need to go wake up my son.

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5 Comments »

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  1. This is just beautiful! Tears welling up in my eyes. I write often about snuggling my son and my worries that he’ll outgrow it sooner than I’m ready. We, too, rock when he’s not ready to get up and even if it’s for just 30 seconds, those 30 seconds make my day for me. 🙂

    Thank you for this touching post!

  2. That is a lovely morning ritual. I always sing to the girls at bedtime, and it’s so calming for me.
    I think that a cuddling boy often doesn’t outgrow it, at least not as early as other kids might. My SIL has two boys, the youngest of whom has always been a cuddler. He’s almost 13, a great athlete and popular kid, and he still snuggles with her several times a week in the rocker. The older son used to make fun of him and pester him to grow up, but now he just rolls his eyes and leaves them alone.

  3. The cuddles will change but they will remain in some form. As my boys grew away from the rocker times they moved toward the days where we would sit in my office or in the kitchen…by ourselves and just talk. We still have wonderful talks and I (and they) really do cherish our closeness. It has made them great guys for the girls they love and the girls have told me so.
    Don’t worry….the rocker will eventually be covered in toys/clothes/junk….but having it there will make him feel good.

  4. I have nominated you for the Leibster award. http://eskimokisses4u.blogspot.com/2013/01/leibster-award.html

  5. That was a beautiful post. And so is this one.

    Both were very needed yesterday. So thank you.

    Abiding with you, now and always.


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